What do you need to know?
Reflective Parenting is a psychoeducational group. It involves a mix of teaching and discussions, it is not therapy.
The group is a space for parents to think about what they bring to the relationship with their child as much as it is about developing a greater understanding of the baby / infant.
The group promotes a specific parenting stance called “mentalizing” and it will cover teaching on child development, parenting and the parent-infant relationship
The aim is to improve the parent's connection and closeness to the infant, to support parents regulate their own distress levels and develop a greater understanding of what they bring to the relationship with their infant
Who is the course appropriate for?
*Parents in Mind are able to take referrals for St Helens Residents with a child under the age of 2*
- The parent may be experiencing difficulties in their relationship with their child.
- The child may be displaying difficult behaviour or responses to the parent which the parent is struggling to manage.
- The parent may already have tried several methods to try to manage the child’s behaviour or emotions without success.
- There could be signs be a pattern of escalating negative cycles of interaction between the parent and child/infant.
- The parent/child will not be at a threshold where they need intensive therapeutic input. If they are, this may just meaning waiting or understanding more about that parent before the course.
- It should be noted to the parent/referrer that RP is not a stand-alone therapeutic intervention but is a psychoeducation group.
- Parents should be motivated and want to join a group and not mandated to attend.
They have now delivered 4 cohorts of RP with parents locally. 90% of service users feeding back that their feelings towards attachment & bonding needs were met after completing Reflective Parenting. 100% feeling an increased sense of confidence in parenting their own child.
Here’s what parents have to say after completing a course:
‘Before this group, I was an absent dad. I wasn’t really interacting with the kids, I didn’t feel we had much bond and I didn’t enjoy the our time together. They never came to me for reassurance or help, they just knew I didn’t want to play. Since I’ve begun with parents in mind and through the help and chats I could have about my own upbringing I’ve realised I’m actually not a bad dad I was just spending too much time being scared to be a good dad. I’ve been able to talk afterwards with the group about moments I’ve overcome recently, moments id never had with my child. I said sorry for the first time to my children and they all hugged me. It was the first moment I felt loved by them for being just me. I love going out with my daughter now, walks in the forest don’t feel something I avoid now, they’re a time we both need and enjoy now.’
‘My son takes up a lot of my thoughts, this is really frustrating but now I’ve completed this course I can use more ways to help him not get so angry. I can help my younger child now understand how different we all are and that we all have big feelings. My sons are just big - a lot. I’ve enjoyed talking to other parents about similar things to do with my child’s extra needs. I don’t get to do that much. It feels quite intense when I’m alone always thinking about if I’m getting it right for him. Now I can sit and think about the things I actually am getting really right so I sit and think more about that now and how am I in all of that.’
‘My son was 16 in the middle of the course, it was really nice to still have things I could use to help him. Even though I have a young baby she isn’t too difficult, it’s very different this time around. But there’s still so much my son needs help with daily, and sometimes at that age it’s really hard when his mums shattered and snappy to know what to do. I know I’m getting lots right after attending this course, and our relationship is special - we’ve worked together on that, he helps me, I help him. I just wasn’t sure if I was helpful so me and him are talking more about that now. We’d stopped doing that as he got older which turns out we both missed. I’m getting more ‘thanks mum’ than ever and it’s not even over the stuff I thought he noticed I do.’
To refer a Parent in:
Email them: Parentsinmind.nw@nct.org.uk
Or contact Lauren Pickering
Parents in Mind Service Delivery Manger St Helens
Tel: 07731994573
Email: Lauren.pickering@nct.org.uk